Way to follow your dream...

Hehehe... bye I nak pi follow my dreams

Boleh plak jadi macam tu??

Hi readers... huhu bersawang lg blog gue ni... busy ngan mba... ni pun baru je habis exam...

Ni nak citer pasal aku ngan mak baru2 ni... aku tgh lepak layan tgk tv... mak plak tgh baca majalah... tetiba dengar bunyi ni...

"Pprrroooottt"

Hahahaha kuat plak tu... apa lagi mak aku lepas mercun cap bontot laa tu... aku saja usik mak..

"Apa bunyi tu mak ooiii?"

Tapi mak aku ni jenis selamba je... macam ni haa mak aku jawab...

"Ala nak buat macam mana... volume control rosak plak dh... tu yg bunyi over tu"

Hahhahaa boleh plak macam tu  mak aku bg jawapan... sabar je laa... makin cheeky plak mak aku ni :)

new equation for chemistry (funny)

hahahaa... i should answer this in my chemistry class & for sure my lecturer totally pengsan...

Tu laa padahnya kalau asyik meniru je...

Ni mak aku laa citer masa dia jd cikgu... tp ni bukan pengalaman mak laa... dari kawan dia....

Mak aku citer masa dia jd cikgu kat teluk cempedak masa tu ada ramai gak budak cina yg masuk tingkatan peralihan.... kawan mak aku ni nama cikgu razak... n dia ajar bahasa Melayu...

Satu hr nk dijadikan cerita... cikgu razak ni suruh student dia buat latihan bina ayat...

So masa dia check kerja bebudak tu... tetiba dia jumpa ayat ni...

"Tahi babi sangat cantik"

Actually aku nk pakai ayat ni buat tajuk entry... tp kang org baca tajuk je bleh pengsan. .. hahahha

Ok balik pada cerita... cikgu razak tu check kerja student dia... ada dlm 12 buku kot tulis ayat yg sama... hahahhaha cuba korang imagine kalau korang jd cikgu razak tu...

So cikgu razak tu pn geram gak... dia panggil semua student 'cerdik' yg buat ayat tu... so soal siasat.. depa x tau apa yg depa tulis tu...then cikgu razak pn bgtau laa apa yg depa semua tulis...

Hahhahaha terkejut beruk sampai terkedu sorang2... baru la depa mengaku selama ni depa tiru je dr sorang budak melayu...

Cikgu razak pn tanya laa kat budak melayu tu... "awat hang buat lagu tu???"... budak tu jawab yg dia geram n fed up pasai depa bebudak cina tu asyik tiru dia... hahaha yg paling x menahan tu... dia kata dia saja tulis ayat tu bg depa tiru.. lepas habis depa tiru... dia padam n tulis elok2...

Hehhehe lawak btul tp cer imagine kalau laa cikgu razak tu x check mesti sampai ke sudah dok tiru je...

Bila kucing suka dengan rambutan..

Hehehe korang tengok sendiri laa.. dua ekor kucing aku tu suka ngan rambutan.. habis buah rambutan tu kena cium n peluk... hahhaha pelik tul ngan bocheh n chico ni... nasib laa depa gomol je... x makan... ermm tinggal dua ni je laa buah hati aku laa ni... nasib laa yg depa dua ekor gomol ni rambutan... kalau durian?? Hahaha

kenapa bini menteri ada banyak baju...

hi readers...

baru2 ni kan kita sambut hari merdeka... masa tgh tengok countdown merdeka kat tv tu.. aku dok sembang ngan mak...

aku : "waahhh best laa jadi bini menteri kan... asyik pakai baju baru je... jarang tgk depa rotate pakai baju sama berulang kali..."

mak : "haaiiissshh tak bleh kata macam tu.. kalau nak ikutkan.. kesian kat depa"

aku : "kesian?? aiikkk dapat pakai baju lawa baru plak tu.. naper plak nak kena kesian??"

mak : "haa laa..cuba u imagine... bini menteri kan ke selalu kena ikut laki depa pi melawat tempat sana sini... hari ni melawat sini.. esok kena pi tempat lain... nanti pak menteri ajak lagi melawat tempat lain plak... so mana ada masa nak basuh baju... tu pasal laa depa kena selalu ada baju baru"

hahahahahahaahha.... serius mak aku buat lawak bengong... yg paling lawak tu.. dia cakap selamba je.. dia x gelak pun... adoiiyyyaaaiii mak aku ni... sempat lagi dia kenakan aku... heheheh tp tu laa tiap kali aku nampak muka bini menteri kat tv mesti aku teringat lawak mak aku tu... mak aku pun tergelak ngan lawak rekaan dia..



kepada korang semua... ni just lawak je ye.. mak aku kenakan aku.. so x de niat nak burukkan mana2 bini menteri...

cerita lawak pasai pilihanraya...

apa kono dengan hang??

x nak cakap banyak.. korang layan je

hahahha lawak gila lagu parodi ni... 

tapi bleh jadi scary kalau mak aku plak yg nyanyi.. huhu :P

Don't mess with women!

A lady gets pulled over for speeding

Woman: "Is there a problem,Officer?"

Officer: "Ma'am,you were speeding."

Woman: "Oh,I see."

Officer: "Can I see your license please?"

Woman: "I'd give it to you but but I don't have one."

Officer: "Don't have one?"

Woman: "Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving."

Officer: "I see....
Can I see your vehicle registration please."

Woman: "I can't do that."

Officer: "Why not?"

Woman: "I stole this car."

Officer: "Stole it?"

Woman: "Yes,and I killed and hacked up the owner."

Officer: "You what?"

Woman: "His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see."

The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls
for back up.

Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car.

A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: "Ma'am,could you step out of your vehicle please!"

The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Woman: "Is there a problem sir?"

Officer 2: "One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and
murdered the owner."

Woman: "Murdered the owner?"

Officer 2: "Yes,could you open the trunk of your car,please."

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: "Is this your car,ma'am?"

Woman: "Yes,here are the registration papers."

The officer is quite stunned.

Officer 2: "One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving
license."

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to
the officer.

The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: "Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a
license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the
owner."

Woman: "I Bet the liar told you I was speeding too..!" :

Moral:
Don't mess with women!

funny facts of life

:)

cara2 nak menjaga handphone (troll version)

10 TIPS PENJAGAAN HANDPHONE (HP), SMARTPHONE, TABLET DAN SEANGKATAN DENGANNYA..

1. Jangan menggoyang-goyangkan HP semasa signal lemah atau tiada. Hal ini akan membuat si HP pening & mual..

2. Jangan charge HP anda terlalu lama (setelah bateri sudah full) Hal ini akan membuat bateri anda bunting/ melembung.. Jika itu terjadi, belum tentu anda mahu bertanggungjawa b & sanggup menikahinya..

3. Jangan terlalu sering bermain game di HP.. Cubalah serius dengannya. Di dunia ini tidak ada yg mahu dipermainkan..seperti anda juga..

4. Jangan terlalu kuat memicit keypad atau skrin sesentuh HP anda. Jika ini berlaku, HP anda akan mengalami cirit-birit lalu tercirit..

5. Cucilah HP anda seminggu sekali agar bersih dari noda, bau & virus. Bayangkan jika anda tidak mandi seminggu.. Begitu juga dengan HP anda..

6. Pakaikan baju / jaket yang tebal pada HP anda. Hal ini akan membuat HP anda berasa lebih nyaman dan selesa serta tahan masuk angin..

7. Jangan terlalu sering mengisi topup kredit yang murah (RM5). Hal ini akan membuat HP anda berasa rendah diri. Semakin mahal semakin tinggi harga dirinya..

8. Gunakan Facebook bersubsidi (0.facebook).. Hal ini akan menjimatkan kredit HP anda..

9. Jangan penuhi HP anda dengan sms dari skandal atau pasangan curang anda. Jika kantoi, maka akan melayanglah nyawa HP anda (mungkin nyawa anda juga turut melayang).

10. Jika anda sedang stress, lemparlah HP pada tempat yang empuk / lembut. Hal ini akan mengelakkan HP anda dari patah hati/tulang belakang

hehehe jangan marah naa... saja bua syok2 je ni.. by the way i copy n paste from amazing nara :)

funny story between accounting n medical students

One day, two students were in a room. 

One was studying medicine & the other was studying accounting. 

The one doing accounting, was cleaning his wardrobe and suddenly, 

he saw ants coming out and going into his wardrobe.

As he was checking for the cause of the invasion, he saw that there was a packet of sugar in his ward.

He opened it, and saw that some were dead. 

He asked the medical student for the reason the ants are dying, 

the medical student replied "May be they died of diabetes." :D

banas paran...

semalam kat rumah.... time tgk tv

mak : eleh nak tunjuk banas paran plak...
aku : haaa?? "banas paran???" apa tu??
mak : alamak silap cakap daa... nak cakap tadi panas baran... (sambil cover muka ngan tangan.. hehehe malu laa tu)

hehehe comel je mak aku ni.. dok tukar buat slogan sendiri plak dah

yuna apa??

haa malam ni ramai laa orang melayan anugerah juara lagu kan.. termasuk laa aku.. huhu x sedar diri sungguh laa aku ni... nak exam pun dok mengadap tv lagi... tp tu laa terpengaruh sebab masa mula2 aku terlepas ombak rindu tp bila mai tang part aweera nyanyi tu memang kerja dok melekat kat depan tv laa... hehehe

well ni nak citer masa aizat nyanyi lagu yuna..... begina ceritanya (ikut style boboi)

mak : owwhhh baru tau nama yuna tu yunalis

aku : ha'ah laa.. nama penuh dia yunalis zarai...

mak : haa??? (muka tercengang)

aku : apsal u dok buat terkejut plak ni...

mak : nama yuna apa tadi??

aku : nama dia yunalis zarai

mak : haahahhaha memang aku silap dengaq laa tadi...

aku : u dengar apa tadi??

mak : i dengar nama yuna tu... "yunalis darai"

hhahahaha bengong betul... habis x bleh concentrate nak tengok tv masa aizat nyanyi... 

aku memang gelak besar laa.. hahaha mak aku ni ada je... 

tp ni bukan dia buat lawak.. dia silap dengar.. 

kesian yuna.. alahai mak aku ni :P

P/S: nasib baik lagu yuna menang.. yeayyy "terukir di bintang, tak mungkin hilang cintaku padamu :)"

adoiyaiii laa mak aku ni....

baru2 ni aku tengah surf internet.. sekali tu mak aku pun mai laa sama...

mak : ina.. ko buat apa tu?

  

me : tengah tengok website seoul garden... nak tengok harga berapa sekarang...

mak : owwhhh... ada promotion tak??"

me : "owh untk warga mahal (al maklum laa emas kan mahal) macam u memang laa ada promotion.. harga rm19.90++... 

mak : yg lagi satu tu apa plak ina??

me : owh yg tu untuk budak2...

mak : wokeh.. nanti kita pi seoul garden kita minta yg pakej budak2...

me : haa?? u ni biar betul.. tak kan laa nak minta harga budak plak...

mak : ye laa i'm kid apa...

me : haa?? kid?? agak2 laa...

mak : i'm kidding... hahahaha 

adoiyaiiii mak aku ni bab mengenakan aku cukup pandai.. hahahaha

parah kalau ada atuk dan cucu yang perangai macam ni.. hehe

new definitions.. fun thing :)

Fantastic Definitions


School:

A place where father pays & son plays


Life Insurance: 

A contract that keeps u poor all your life

So that u can die rich.


Marriage: 

Its an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor’s degree & a woman gains her Masters.


Doctor: 

A person who kills your ills by pills & kills u by bills.

afraid of...

oh my god.. how can it be??

hahahha cuak giler muka anjing tu... hehhehe cute sungguh pic ni

tapi kalau sungguh laa anjing kawen ngan kucing.. 

agak2 laa kan keturunan depa tu nanti nak letak nama apa ye??

anjing + kucing = ancing/kuan/jingcing/kujing... huhu lol :P

manipulation of questions...

Police: Where do you live?
Me: With my parents
Police:Where does your parents live?
Me: With me
Police: Where do you all live?
Me: Together
Police: Where is your house?
Me: Next to my neighbors house
Police: Where is your neighbor's house?
Me: If I tell you, you won't believe me

Police: Tell me
Me: Next to my house :)